What Will He Do with His Time?

When Dave first moved in, we wondered “what will he do with his time?” Is he going to play video games all day? Will he use his free time wisely? This is one of the things parents worry about when our kids live independently. We certainly worried about what Dave would be doing all day long on his own.

Video Games

To be sure, he plays video games. Like many boys and men, he likes action video games (like wrestling) and survival/horror games (like Friday the 13th). He likes to create women wrestlers. He is, after all, a young man. He doesn’t like me to see what he is doing, though. He knows I won’t approve! Friday the 13th is one of his favorite games and he sometimes even plays online with other people. He gets judgy, though, when he is playing with someone he thinks is too young to play a game that is so violent. He also enjoys other video games, like Minecraft, which his beloved nephew taught him how to play. As we drive around, he often points out houses and buildings and says “I could make that!” And I’m sure he can!

Employment

Dave has worked since high school. His first job was making pizza sauce at a shop that sells calzones. His favorite food is pizza, so that was a good fit! Alas, when the business was sold, the new manager was not interested in employing my son any longer. After he moved into his new apartment, he began working at a university dining hall. He thought the students were slobs! I reminded him that he wouldn’t have a job if they weren’t. Unfortunately, he had just moved into his new apartment when he started this job and was not getting enough sleep, which affected his performance. That job didn’t last too long.

He soon began working at an organization that supports people with disabilities and offers opportunities for piece work. This experience is considered a stepping stone to other opportunities if the individual is capable enough. Dave is very capable, and eventually landed a great job at Goodwill.

Goodwill

In 2014, Dave had an opportunity to work at Goodwill. The plan was for him to work there for several weeks so they could assess his capabilities prior to hiring him. In preparation, I sat down with his supports coordinator, a representative from the Office of Vocational Rehabilitation (OVR), and the director of our regional Goodwill. The OVR representative explained to me that the assessment was costly and would cut into the funds he uses for transportation and habilitation aides. We went back and forth for a while, discussing how to accomplish it. It was very confusing to me. I shed some tears.

Then, abruptly, the director of Goodwill exclaimed that he would just hire Dave right away. He claimed that he “drank the Kool-aid” – he was committed to Goodwill’s mission. I will be forever grateful to him. Dave works 20 hours a week at Goodwill, and has thrived there. His first job was organizing housewares, which he was very good at. By now he’s done most of the available jobs. He especially likes helping customers. If they ask where something is, he takes them to it, rather than just telling them. He even received the “Employee of the Year” award about 5 years ago!

Free time

Working 20 hours per week still leaves a lot of free time. So, what does he do with his free time? Besides video games, Dave spends much of his free time doing artistic activities that he learns from Youtube. He learned how to make duct tape wallets and spent many months doing that. He loves horror films, especially Friday the 13th, and he enjoys recreating the masks and the attire from each film. It isn’t easy for me to watch him take a perfectly good shirt and cut holes in it! Currently he has been making tie dye shirts. In addition to his artistic endeavors, he likes to play Yu-gi-oh. He spends a lot of his time creating decks, which he changes when I win our weekly game, which isn’t very often. Upcoming blog posts will include the joys and challenges of his free time activities.